


‘Scuse Me, While I Kiss This Guy

by OpenPage



Series: Sub Rosā [7]
Category: 21 Jump Street (TV)
Genre: Explicit Language, Humor, M/M, No Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2016-03-16
Packaged: 2018-05-27 01:50:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6264880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OpenPage/pseuds/OpenPage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I decided to write a sequel to “Crime and Punishment”, but it can be read as a stand alone story. This is a pointless tale, just for fun. Oh, and I apologise for the mondegreen title, I just couldn’t resist ;)</p>
            </blockquote>





	‘Scuse Me, While I Kiss This Guy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ute](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ute/gifts), [Calacious](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Calacious/gifts), [Peace_On_Earth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peace_On_Earth/gifts), [fortheloveofliterature](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortheloveofliterature/gifts), [Wormy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wormy/gifts), [ToBeOrNotToBe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToBeOrNotToBe/gifts).



> **Disclaimer: I do not own 21 Jump Street or any the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. All characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.**
> 
> **No copyright infringement is intended.**
> 
> **Based on the TV series 21 Jump Street.**

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/156893755@N07/35807011692/in/dateposted-public/)

Nothing could have prepared Tom for the deafening silence that greeted him when he walked into the main hub of the Jump Street Chapel. Dozens of pairs of eyes followed him as he walked the excruciatingly long walk to his desk, but before he could sit down and bury his flaming face behind some paperwork, Doug grabbed him by the arm and yanked him to one side.

“So, you’re _really gay?”_

Considering Penhall had caught him wearing a cock ring while Booker fucked him up the ass, Tom figured they’d already established that fact, and he was a little surprised by the question. But he successfully hid his discomfort behind a guise of nonchalance, and shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he rocked back on his heels and stared rigidly at his friend. “Yup.”

“But when did this happen?” Penhall demanded, his voice rising to an annoying whine. “I mean, you weren’t gay six months ago.”

Unable to hide his annoyance any longer, Tom shot his friend a withering look. “Well, _gee,_ Penhall, I never knew you could see inside my mind. How the hell do you know whether I was or not?”

“But … but … you slept with _women!”_ Doug spluttered. Although he’d had twelve hours to adjust to the knowledge that his best friend _took it up the ass,_ he was still struggling with the concept. Not because he was homophobic; he wasn’t, in fact, he didn’t have a bigoted bone in his body. What was screwing with his mind was that Tom had kept such a huge secret from him. They were best friends, and best friends shared everything, or so he had thought.

“Okay, so I guess I’m bi,” Tom clarified sharply. “But I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal. Last night you said you were happy for me. What’s changed?”

Doug shuffled his feet like a small child, his middle and forefinger unconsciously rubbing at his upper lip. He _was_ happy for Tom, finding true love was never easy. What the young officer wasn’t sure about was Hanson’s choice of partner, after all, Booker’s infidelity was common knowledge around the Chapel. He was a girl—and as it turned out also a _boy_ —in every town kind of guy, and Doug was worried his friend was about to get his heart broken. However, he knew better than to interfere _too_ much. Tom was stubborn to a fault, and if he wanted to date a roguish sonofabitch like Booker, then not even God himself could stop him. 

With Tom’s dark, penetrative gaze boring into him, Doug sought to reassure his friend. “Nothing’s changed, buddy. I _am_ happy for you. It’s just … is it _only_ Booker you’re attracted to, or do you feel something for other men too?”

Tom knew Doug well enough to know it was not his intention to behave like a prick. The young officer was genuinely curious, and therefore, he decided not to take offence at the inappropriateness of the question. “I dunno, I never really thought about it,” he muttered, his hand rubbing awkwardly at the back of his neck. 

But as his eyes flitted nervously around the room, his gaze settled on Harry, and a devilish grin tilted his lips. The opportunity presented to him was too perfect to ignore, and deciding to _stir the pot,_ his eyes roved hungrily over Ioki’s taut body. “You know, now you mention it, Harry’s kinda cute.”

Penhall’s eyebrows shot up into his hairline, and a nervous smile twitched at the corners of his lips. “Um, _really?_ Sooo, does that mean you fancy me too?”

It was a typical response by those who were not part of the LGBTIQ community. For some reason, they nearly always seemed to think that those in same-sex relationships lusted after _everyone_ on the planet of the same gender. However, rather than be affronted, it took all of Tom’s willpower not to burst out laughing. But fortunately, he was a consummate actor, and his expression remained serious, even though he was giggling on the inside. “No, Doug. I’m not about to tackle you to the ground and rob you of your virginity.”

Hurt softened Penhall’s eyes. “You don’t think I’m cute?” he questioned with a sulky pout.

The expression on Doug’s face was beyond adorable, but Tom was not about to let his friend off the hook that easily. “No,” he reiterated. “Not really.”

“Why not?” Doug pressed, a look of disbelief widening his eyes. “Plenty of other people think I am.”

“Sorry,” Tom replied with a shrug. “I guess you’re just not my type.”

Caught up in a wave of narcissism, Penhall missed the teasing twinkle shining from Tom’s eyes. “But why?” he whined. “What is it about me you don’t like?”

Without breaking character, Tom placed a finger against his lips and carefully studied Doug’s face. “I think it might be your hair … no, wait, it’s your eyes, they’re kinda shifty.”

The moment finally dawned, and Doug suddenly realized his friend was taking the piss. A broad smile spread across his handsome face, and he swatted his friend with his hand. “Asshole,” he chided with a chuckle. “You really had me going for a minute.”

After several seconds, Tom’s amused expression transformed into a look of concern. “We’re okay, aren’t we?” he asked quietly. “I mean, I know it’s a lot to take in, but it’s not going to change things between us, is it?”

Penhall’s expression softened, and he placed a companionable hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Of course not,” he reassured gently. “We’re the McQuaids, remember? Nothing can break that bond.”

From a few feet away, Booker observed the conversation, his blackened eyes narrowing into resentful slits. Even though Penhall had thought he was protecting Tom, the dark-haired officer was still angry about the beating he had received, and the last thing he wanted to witness was a tête-à-tête between his antagonist and his lover, no matter how innocent it might be. While he knew he needed to accept the close friendship that existed between the two men, he often found it increasingly difficult to curb his jealousy. But now their secret was out in the open, he saw no need to hold back his feelings. Resentment raged through his veins, tensing his muscles, and when Penhall pulled Tom into a tight embrace, he was unable to remain inactive any longer. He pushed back his chair, and striding purposely across the room, he grabbed Doug by the shoulders and rudely shoved him sideways. “‘Scuse me,” he snapped.

Penhall opened his mouth in protest, but Booker ignored him and grabbing Tom’s upper arms, he shoved him forcefully against a nearby filing cabinet. Before Hanson could object, he crushed his body against him, and without holding back, he pressed his mouth against the warmth of his lover’s lips and kissed him possessively.

As their passion deepened, a cacophony of wolf whistles, cat calls, and approving claps resonated around the room, and embarrassed by the overt display of affection, Penhall made a hasty retreat to his desk. But when the kiss finally ended and the two men broke apart, he saw a look of utter devotion shining from Booker’s dark eyes, and any misgivings about the two men’s relationship instantly vanished. It was obvious Dennis loved Tom, and in a world filled with violence and hate, that was all that mattered.

Therefore, when Booker turned and waggled his eyebrows in a provocative gesture, he pushed down the feeling of resentment he felt toward the smug officer and taking a deep, calming breath, he approached with an outstretched hand. “No hard feelings?” 

Dennis cast a wary eye at Doug, but when Tom jabbed him sharply in his bruised ribs, he inhaled a gasp of pain, and swallowing his pride, he briefly shook the proffered hand. “Sure.”

Dozens of officers watched on with growing curiosity, their work temporarily forgotten as they waited to see what would happen next. Eventually, it was Tom who broke the awkward silence, and placing a hand on each man’s shoulder, he grinned impishly. “So, drinks tonight? That way, Penhall, you can ask all the inappropriate questions you’re dying to ask, and, Dennis, you can show your disapproval by scowling angrily from across the table.”

An amused grin twitched at Booker’s lips, but his bravado remained intact. “Whatever,” he replied with a shrug of his shoulders.

More than anything, Tom wanted the two most important people in his life to get along, and turning his attention to his best friend, he raised a questioning eyebrow. “Doug?”

It was a defining moment in Doug and Tom’s relationship, and the audience of officers watched on with bated breath. “Okay, Hanson,” Penhall replied, a slow smile brightening his face. “But you’re buying.”

A collective sigh of relief echoed throughout the room. It had been touch and go for a moment, but it was the two men’s unwavering love for Tom that had ultimately brought them together.

_Finis_


End file.
